I don't wanna pout anymore.

I think I am only going to start updating when something worthwhile happens in my life. Like if I win money or something. I've been a little down lately but nothing a few days won't remedy. All I think about is how much I want to buy new things: clothes, cds, shoes, haircuts. I want want want want. Kathy is going to be in a magazine in Spain, Jill is in Florida getting a tan, Krista is having a breakdown from essays, I am unhealthy.

Today I am going TANNING. You will all be jealous when I look like the girl from the L.A. Weight Loss ad and you all look sickly and white. Actually, who am I kidding, if I am in the sun too long I get a rash.

Edit:

I went to the "tanning salon", sooo relaxing. I got home and realized I was hungry and made a mish mash of pasta, garlic, vegetables and misc junk. I ate it so fast and now I have heart burn. Right now I am fighting the urge to go over to the mall and buy something, anything. Maybe I will satisfy my craving by wearing something of Nicole's. I hate when I have girl moments. I get them about once a month, usually close to where your body errupts like the Halifax Explosion and you bleed and bloat everywhere. I think i'm going to get drunk now. I have a half a bottle of wine that is just begging for it. I haven't really done anything fun/interesting in awhile and I want to have a life again. However, I am starting to feel like an old woman. I am completely satisified with sitting in my apartment, drinking coffee or tea, reading a book or watching Freaks and Geeks (which is my new favorite hobby, thanks Kaffy). I have barely smoked at all lately and I don't really want to. THIS IS A GOOD THING. I have little desire to go to bars or wear pants and I feel like wearing make-up and jeans should be reserved for a special occassion. Simply put, I have aquired the lifestyle of a dirt bag. And I like it. If anyone is up (or down, what is the cool way to say that?) for eating and watching mindless television, you know my numba.